a full blown reality show

As I've become a mom of three, almost four weeks ago, there are days when I feel like I'm filming a reality show entitled "The Frumpy Mom. " I'm certain the audience would either feel better about themselves or  think, "Good for her for going out with all three kids with no make-up and in clothes that make her look like a fashion nightmare. How brave!" Or maybe, having been there, they'd just laugh.Too much chaos, too many unfortunate accidents and tantrums, that's there's too little time to pay attention to fashion. I think it's unfortunate that I look like a chaotic mess in front of people we haven't seen in a year while standing in line at the pediatricians office.  But, my body did a remarkable, miraculous thing three weeks ago when I was given the opportunity to birth a baby. Really, it's all in my perception. And it's really easy for me to look at others and compare, really easy to fall into the mommy guilt trap. Really easy to lose focus of what my role really is as a mother. And it's really easy to do all those things when you're short on sleep.

I think in true reality all moms lives are like this--choatic, messy and sometimes unfashionable.  It just  seems like all eyes are on you when it's your kid that's being loud, serenading the check out line with their hunger screams (thank you, Miss Ava), or when you look like you haven't showered in a week. When walking out of Target that day I encountered another mom having trouble with her two year old while trying to shepherd them into the store. Suddenly, I didn't feel so alone.

Daddy's Night

Tonight was Daddy/Daughter night at Audrey's preschool. It's a night where the preschool students invite their Dads to see what they do at school. Audrey was very excited for this. Leading up to tonight, the teachers asked students what their Dads do at work. On Audrey's paper she brought home it said, "He sits at the computer and money comes out." When I asked her what Daddy does at work she said, "He makes money so we can run errands and buy stuff." Well, I think she's pretty much figured it out!

Audrey wanted to look pretty for her date with Daddy, so we painted her nails and picked out a fancy dress. She picked out her jewelry.

They had a great time. They played, the kids had songs they sang for the Dads and they ate ice cream sundaes.

Allie, Ava and I stayed home and visited with Grandmother and Cheryle.

Audrey and Daddy before Daddy's Night

Sarah

Almost three weeks

love little feet!

Love those lips

Sarah

Hoping and Praying and doing a little dance

Hoping, praying, crossing my fingers and doing a little dance that I'm able to finally enjoy my new bundle of precious joy without pain, plugged ducts and flu-like symptoms that have been my life the last three weeks.

I finally got into see the nurse practitioner today after two and a half weeks of intense pain when nursing, burning and tingling when not, multiple plugged ducts and I'm fairly certain a undiagnosed case of mastitis that I worked through on my own. Now, feeling flu like again and fearing another, larger issue, I made an appointment hoping to walk out with antibiotics. I managed two children this trip.  The baby and miss Allie, while Audrey was at school. Our original plan was to go view Ava's newborn pictures from the photographer this morning. I was so pumped about seeing them, I almost didn't call the doctor, again.  

Even though we waited longer than anticipated for the doctor, and had to call the photographer multiple times to push back our viewing time, mission accomplished! I walked out with two prescriptions. 

And, Ava's pictures were absolutely precious. Even though I'm a hobby photographer, I'm so happy that I set up a photo shoot outside of our home for her. 

Ava continues to be adorable. And she's fitting into this family perfectly. She's now 2 weeks and 6 days, more or less 3 weeks old. I no longer wake her to eat in the middle of the night. She wears 0-3 month clothes and size 1 diapers. She's getting 70% formula and 30% breast milk.

Sarah

Ava's two week check-up

This morning Ava had her two week check-up at the pediatricians office. I was nervous about telling him I was weaning, as I'd never stopped giving my babies breast milk so early before. We have a pretty good understanding, their doctor and I and after four years, he kinda knows my parenting style, etc, so I'm not sure why I was so nervous. He simply said, "That's fine. You gotta do what it takes to survive." he told me this as I was sitting there feeding her a bottle of breast milk that I'd pumped earlier. He continued the  exam with her on my lap and said she looks perfect! She got labeled "sassy" in the hospital after birth (as do all my girls) because of her spit fire personality in the nursery. Apparently she wasn't too happy about being apart from her momma!  Her weight? 8 lbs, 13 oz....Allie's birth weight! So, she'd gained close to a pound in two weeks. Her assignments: tummy time, gain 2-3 pounds by two months and begin to smile.


After we picked Audrey up from school, Aunt Autumn came to our house and went with us to Allie's hemangioma appointment. There is no doubt that I could have taken all three girls to see Allie's plastic surgeon  but there is no doubt I wanted to tackle that alone. Sooooooo thankful for Aunt Autumn and her availability that afternoon. Because I was still weaning and pushing myself to do so, I stuffed my bra with ice packs and loaded the girls in the car. As always, it took us an hour to get there and we saw the doctor for maybe five minutes. In that five minutes we discussed surgery and what he would do to remove it, and what harm, if any there was to waiting to see if it shrinks on it's own. We agreed to wait and see what it looks like in six months. Our entertainment that day? The girls watching Aunt Autumn blow bubbles with her gum. Since Jeremy nor I chew gum, I think this was the first time they'd ever seen anyone blow aw bubble, and they thought it was hilarious! Allie kept saying, "wow, that was a big one!" and "do it again!"

Tonight, I finally was able to capture Ava smiling. She smiles often, but it's still random.

Ava smiling. 2 weeks

Sarah

Just when I thought today would be uneventful

Just when I thought today would be uneventful around here, I found hair clippings in the girls' bathroom and a pair of yellow preschool scissors. Audrey decided to cut her own hair.

Actually I think she might have a knack for cutting hair, it wasn't too awful, in fact I didn't even notice until I found the hair in the bathroom . But then, if I look just right,  it's obvious. At least she didn't cut bangs!





Sarah

Life with Three

It seems I can't go a day without someone asking me, "How is life with 3?"  Truly for us, going from two children to three was easier than going from one to two. That's no lie. But can I be brutally honest here? The transition is always a little rough for us. We don't come home on day one and just fall into a routine. Right now, life is chaotic and frightfully messy. I'm very tired and still in pain.But I'm not sure that's what people really want to hear when they ask the question. I answered my friend the other day who is pregnant with her third with, "It's loud." And it is. Life with 3 girls is great, we wouldn't have it any other way, but right now it's a bit bumpy. We're just holding on, waiting to see what they come up with next and hoping they sleep through the night. 

My life as of late:

1. Last night, my hands were in dishwater trying to wash pump parts and listen to Audrey and scold Allie all while Ava was crying and Jeremy was on the phone asking me what I wanted on my pizza. I had no idea. I had no brain space left to compute that answer. None at all. Normally I can multitask with the best of them, but loud noise and little sleep throw me a little.

2.  Walking across my family room floor sometimes means you risk getting cereal stuck between your toes. My older girls have stepped it up a notch on making messes--and creative messes nonetheless. Strawberry jam, poop on the carpet, cereal, crayons on the wall, just to name a few. They are slowly adjusting to having less attention from me.

3. I just simply can't wait to dress the girls up for Easter.

4. My laundry room needs an expansion.

5. I am an episode of "What Not to Wear." I'm really anxious to get back into regular and smaller clothes!

6.  Breastfeeding/pumping.....BLEH! I am accepting that I will not be that mother who blissfully nurses their child in the meadow. I wish I was. I have decided to give Ava formula after another not so lovely attempt at nursing.

6b. Standing in the formula aisle a little overwhelmed with choices and emotions and frustrations. This is why women breastfeed--to have control over what they are giving their child and not spend their college fund on feeding them. Gracious. You just pray and hope that the formula company doesn't have a recall or screw up somehow while your child is consuming it.

7. Trying to figure out the best way to put all three car seats in the van. And then rearranging them three times.

8. washing bottles, sterilizing bottles,  repeat.

9. trying to take a moment, in the midst of the chaos,  to study each of my little lovelies, memorize how they look, give them a hug, read them a book, or have them climb on my lap, sometimes two at a time and just rock for a minute. and for heavens sake, take a picture.

10. organizing/directing and executing a plan to get to preschool, gymnastics and dance every week, multiple times a week and on time. with everyone dressed, coats, hats, and more importantly, shoes on! Realizing all the time that women with more than three kids do this and more everyday....successfully.

11. I am understanding that caffeine may need to be a part of my life again.

12. I'm knee deep in diapers, legos and sleepless nights--which is what I told our travel agent the other day. He is planning our Disney vacation because again, I'm knee deep in diapers, legos and breast milk.

13. lots of take-out.

14. spending the majority of our weekly budget on diapers, wipes and now formula. Audrey still wears some sort of overnight pull-up and Allie and Ava are both in diapers.

15. orchestrating quiet time so that it coincides with Ava's long nap. That's not logistics... that's art.

16. I'm catching up on all my daytime TV.

17. I'm D-D-D Dora'ed out!

18. Trying to keep a straight face when Allie does something wrong. I don't know what it is, but that child has a way of cracking me up with her answer to the question, "Allie, what happened here?" or "Allie, why did you do that?"

19. Trying to adjust to less me time. Ava takes so much of my attention and energy during the day and then keeping up with the other girls, my goal most days is to just get a shower.

Right now, sometimes life demands that I take one hour at a time.  I look at the older girls, just amazed at how big and grown up they seem. I know how quickly the days turn into weeks and weeks turn into years. Which is why I write down how life is day to day.









Sarah

What a good big sister

Audrey and Ava

Audrey and Ava

Sarah

The police came to our house today

 Well today got off to a stellar start. 

After feeding, burping and rocking Ava for two hours in the middle of the night and then I sat down to pump after going six hours (trying to wean), and trying to call Jeremy who was asleep upstairs for help and him not answering, I crawled into bed tossing and turning I finally went back to sleep for maybe 20 minutes until my phone, on vibrate, woke me at 6:10 a.m. a split second before Jeremy jumped out of bed and said, "The alarm is going off!" Not his alarm, the security  alarm. We didn't catch it before it dispatched the police.

When the police knock on our door. Jeremy answers, apologizes and explains to the officer that our two year old (who is now standing on the stairs in her nightgown behind him, waving) set it off in an attempt to play with her legos.

FB status today: Well today got off to a stellar start. We woke up to the security alarm going off and didn't catch it before it dispatched the police at 6:00 a.m. Miss Allie tripped the motion detector. That's after Ava was up for two hours straight from 3-5 and before I found the girls got into the baking cabinet and ate bittersweet chocolate squares for breakfast. But. Thanks to my friend Ginger who bought me coffee today, my morning is looking up! 



Sarah

2 weeks old today

Sarah

surviving dance

Today, I survived back to back dance classes for the first time with all three girls, without any major catastrophes. Allie's class, then a break for lunch, then Audrey's class takes us away from home, with drive time, approx 2 hours and 20 minutes. Still in the weaning process and not being able to always go 3-4 hours, I had to make sure I grabbed the pump and pieces, plus food for Ava, two sets of tutus, dance shoes, hair up in ponytails, breakfast, all three buckled in car seats and a check for the instructor. Miraculously, we managed to get there and were only two minutes late. Nothing major happened, like poop blowouts or tantrums and we even loaded up and unloaded the car in-between for lunch. Whew. We've proven it's possible, now to pull it off every week just as smoothly.

Audrey does not normally feed Ava--but I wanted to get a picture of the three girls after we survived our first dance class venture. 

Sarah

Audrey will turn 5!?

monday february 20

Today I realized that this is Audrey's last full year at home before she starts school. That fact hit me like a ton of bricks and peaked my anxiety levels for a moment. We were planning our Disney Vacation and Jeremy corrected me saying that Allie will almost be 3 (eek) and Audrey will be nearly 5 when we go. My heart stopped for a moment and I nearly cried, which these days of post partum-ness, doesn't take much. 

While we were in the family room discussing this harsh reality, Audrey was in the piano room coloring her toe nails with crayons and Allie was building another creation with her legos. She loves legos. 

Sarah

Dates with Daddy

This weekend, sensing that the older girls needed some undivided attention, Jeremy took Audrey and Allie on a date. On Saturday he took Audrey to the museum where they spent hours playing. They then got lunch and came home. On Sunday he took Allie to the pool to swim. Allie loveeeeesss to swim and he said she looked like a prune when he finally convinced her to get out of the pool.






Sarah

feb 17

After yesterdays crisis, my mom called last night and said she was taking off work today to come and help. We did not argue. And I think Jeremy did a little dance around the room. (metaphorically, of course). She was thinking that with Monday being a holiday, this would give me four more days to get nursing/pumping/weaning under control.

Ava enjoying some time with Grandmother

sweet Ava, 10 days old

Sarah

Strawberry Jam and other catastrophes

This day challenged the very essence of the term survival mode.

It did not go well.

At all.

The first few weeks of bringing home a newborn is what we call survival mode at our house. The goal of the day when in survival mode, is to put whatever energy we have  into keeping each member of the family alive and healthy.  Nothing more.

Up to today, there were challenges and feeding woes but today was the day that life just kinda fell apart for a few hours.

In between feeding Ava milk I'd pumped in the middle of the night and calling the lactation consultant and then working up the courage to pump, solely on one side, it took around 40 minutes for me to pump about 1 oz. I normally pump 1 oz in 1 minute. It hurt. In that 40 minutes of intense toe curling, sobbing pain, my older girls were  on their own.  And thus the story of Strawberry Jam:

Strawberry Jam  8:30 a.m.
Mess #1: In the midst of my pumping nightmare that morning, the girls were playing in Allie's room. This is routine. They do this most days while waiting for me to make breakfast. There I sat on the edge of my bed, with flu-like symptoms and in tears, working up the courage to pump my sore boobs when Audrey, comes to my room, with pink stuff all over her hands and arms and says, "Mom! We made strawberry jam." I just looked at her through my pain and hesitantly asked, "What?" She repeated what i thought she said, and then invited me to come and see. I'm thinking, "Seriously? You are drawing my attention to this on purpose?" I put down the pumping parts and  trudge down the hallway. I find pink lotion all over their step stools, the carpet, themselves and countless stuffed animals and dolls.  I can see  pink toothpaste, body lotion, a toothbrush, Allie's fluoride free toothpaste and the cover to their vent scattered on the floor like a crime scene.  They had combined Audrey's watermelon toothpaste and their white body lotion to make "strawberry jam"

 Audrey cleaned up the mess as best she could. I didn't even  care that there was toothpaste on the carpet and I figured, it's already matted in there, it can wait 6 more hours until Jeremy gets home. When I texted him a brief description of the situation, he replied, " This is our life now, not much we can do but try to keep everyone alive from day to day."

The plan to make "strawberry jam" was actually elaborate, Audrey explained later to Jeremy. They had a certain way of mixing it together and then putting it under Allie's bed to bake... and then they would package it and ship it to the stores.  They claim, no one ate it. Thank heavens.

Mess #2: Allie and he Honey Nut Cheerios.  She'd found the new Sam's size bag in the pantry and opened it. Nearby I saw an empty snack trap. So maybe she tried to fill it and just missed? I can still see her sprawled out in nothing but a diaper, almost making Cheerio angels, while picking up handfuls and shoving all that would fit, and then some, in her mouth. (sigh)

By Noon, I'd called the lactation consultant twice, my OB once, my primary doctor and I had dialed another OB's office when my Mother on her own will left work after three hours to come help. Her decision to travel 45 minutes to our house came after our original phone conversation was cut short because I gasped and hurriedly said, "I'll have to call you back." I missed three phone calls from her within four minutes. She was afraid that something happened to Ava. Ava was fine.

Mess # 3 Approx 11:30 a.m. : From across the house, while on the phone with my mother, I saw Allie reach into her diaper and pull out a handful of poop.  I could just see her squishing it in her little hands and either eating it or rubbing it on the couch before I could reach her. I felt like I was moving in slow motion as I jumped up and ran across the room, dodging legos and barbies and countless books and grabbed her arm just as she was putting down her poop.

Mess #4: Ava, not to be outdone, decided to produce an exorbitant amount of poop in the afternoon, resulting in her first ever "blow out." By this time, my mother was here and this mess was somewhat laughable.

Life got better after my mom arrived. We were able to control the messes and I was able to concentrate on just taking care of me and Ava for a few hours. 

So today, yeah, was not a great day. But, we will find our groove and begin to function normally soon. I hope.



Sarah

feb 15 and Ava's photo shoot

February 15th. A Wednesday.  I took all three girls to preschool today by myself and then took Ava to her newborn photo shoot, in which she projectile spit up breast milk all over my face and hair. That was the first time I'd ever tasted my own milk. 

the sneak peek

Sarah

Valentine's Day 2012

eating breakfast and the cupcakes the girls decorated for Valentine's Day.

February 14th-- Happy Valentine's Day! My first day at home with the girls. At breakfast, the girls opened their gifts from me; New outfits for their Bitty dolls and a heart shaped container of M&M's. We used our Valentine cups and plates, and heart bowls to eat cereal and strawberries. Jeremy bought Audrey a pink heart necklace and matching bracelet and bought Allie a stuffed elephant--her favorite animal. I got a lovely bouquet of flowers. We made cupcakes and the girls decorated them. When Jeremy got home, he took the older girls around to neighbors within walking distance to deliver their Valentine's; candy bags. 

Around 9:45 a.m. I switched Ava to bottles. 

When Avent came out with pink bottles, of course we had to buy them! Ava drinking breast milk from a bottle for the first time. 

I had planned on taking all three girls to dance this morning, but when I got free enough to think about getting everyone ready, dance had already started. So, I  took some pictures of the older girls with their Bitty's in their new outfits instead. 

Sarah

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY

Love, 

Audrey and Allie

My friend Laura, from Laura Kruger Photography took these pictures of the girls at her studio, and made the treat bag toppers. 

treat bag topper that stapled  over the top of a clear treat bag. we filled ours with candy. 

Sarah

weight check and trip to the lactation consultant

Monday the 13th (day four of being home from the hospital) was my last day with all day help.  My mom came and helped me take Audrey to school and then Ava and I visited the lactation consultant after her weight check. She gained back her birth weight and more! Yeah! She weighed 8 lbs when she was born. She weighed 8 lbs, 3 oz today. She had gained half a pound in three days. Probably because she ate every hour and a half the day before! Mommy has good milk! The nurse encouraged me to continue breastfeeding even though it was painful. I'm confident she had no idea how severe it was. She told me to watch out for mastitis. Um, check. And continue to smother on the lanolin. Um, check check. 

Audrey's Valentine's Day at School

Audrey had her Valentine's Party today at school. She wore her Valentine dress and took her Barbie Valentine's for her classmates. She had made a box resembling a mailbox to put them in at school and was pretty excited about looking at all of them when she got home. They were instructed to just sign their name and not put who it was to, which made putting them together soooo much faster.

Audrey before school. I have no idea why she wanted to pose with Jesse this morning.
She hasn't played with her in months. 

Sarah

Our first weekend as a family of five

Friday February 10th. Ava went to the doctor for her three day check up and her weight was down, to 7 lbs, and something. Honestly, I forget the ounces but it was enough of a loss that her pediatrician wanted to see her back on Monday for a weight check. If she hadn't gained her birth weight back, he'd suggest supplementing in some form.

Saturday February 11th. Happy Birthday Uncle Drew! Uncle Drew, Aunt Autumn, Uncle Ben and Aunt Hannah came to meet Ava before going out to celebrate Drew's birthday. Can't believe he's 25!  Allie got into the cake the hospital gave us today. The girls like to watch when I change Ava's diaper.  They get their step stools and the ottoman and climb up so they can see me change her or give her a sponge bath on the pack and play changing table. Allie still brings her toys to play with.

The girls continued to love on Ava, asking her hold her often.

Ava is doing well, despite my nursing issues. I often have to wake her up to nurse.  I love this cuddly stage where she eats and then sleeps so peacefully.

The girls love holding Ava. 

Ava, 4 days old

Allie after finding the cake the hospital gave us

Sarah

Meeting Their Sister

Audrey and Allie met Ava tonight. They had stayed at Grandma and Grandpa's house while we were in the hospital. We used our iPhones and laptops to Face Time with them, so they'd seen Ava, just not in person. They came home tonight, a few hours after we got home and brought dinner. Can't believe I forgot to get our first picture as a family of five! Or a picture of the three of them together.

Audrey was excited to see and hold Ava. She had on her Big Sister shirt, and had asked Grandma to braid her hair and put several hair clips in so she'd look pretty. Allie had fallen asleep in the van and was more interested in sleeping. Although, once she woke up she wouldn't stop wanting to touch Ava and hold her and she kept saying, "Baby Eva (Ava)!" At one point Grandpa said, "You may have too much help on your hands." the girls were suffocating for a few minutes, each wanting to hold her and touch her. So curious they were! I look for them to lose interest in a few weeks but continue to be loving sisters. At least until they start sharing clothes.

Allie is getting over a cold/cough so I was reluctant to let her hold Ava, but she begged and begged and once I put her in her arms she got the biggest smile on her face I'd ever seen. It was adorable.

Sarah

Welcome Home, Ava

Today we brought home a precious baby girl with the longest eye lashes you've ever seen. Ava came home, to a loving home and two sisters who were very eager to meet her. Today was grand central station in our hospital room. At one point I looked over at Jeremy and said we'd have more rest if we were at home!  It seems a lot of people want your attention when you're leaving the hospital. The hospital photographer, the hospital pastoral staff, the nurses with all the discharge instructions, the pediatrician, my nurses,  the lactation consultant and our church's visitation committee all visited with us. It was a happy day, bringing home daughter number three, healthy and beautiful. It was the day we officially began our life as a family of five, all home together for the first time.

For the last two years, I've written about this day, February 9. In 2009 this was the day we found out I'd had a miscarriage. Up until today, this day brought a little anxiety, and a little sadness when I'd think about it.  This year my mind was too preoccupied with taking care of little Ava, to really, even put together that the date was the 9th. Today, instead of leaving the hospital in tears, we left overjoyed with sweet Ava.

We are so grateful for all three of our girls who fill our home with love, giggles, a little bit of drama and lots of shoes! :)

We've been so blessed.

Welcome home, Ava.

Sarah

Picking a Name

For awhile, it was like throwing darts. We had a lot of options, none of which we were thrilled about. We agreed on Ava Grace seconds before the call went through to my parents from the delivery room. It was Ava Grace or Ava Caroline. I'm happy we chose Ava Grace.

For the first time  our daughter was labeled "baby girl" on armbands and hospital papers because an hour before she was born, and an hour after she was born we were still debating between Ava and Adalyn. or Adelyn. or Adeline. or Addelyn. and/or Addalyn. This in the end, the multiple spelling dilemma, is why Adelyn didn't make the cut.

Our top picks we've tossed around since the beginning: (written before Miss Ava was born)

1. Ava--Although incredibly popular, she more than likely won't go to college with a thousand other Avas. It's an older name, which fits well with Audrey and Allie. It took me awhile to get Jeremy on board due to an association he had with the name having to do with WWII. If you know anything about WWII you'll get this right away. If you don't, don't ask. Ava Kate. Ava Grace. Ava Claire. Ava Lee, Ava Renee and as of late, Ava Caroline.

2. Aerin/Erin--Jeremy has always liked the name Erin for a girl.  I like how it sounds with Audrey and Allie. But I wanted to spell it with an A. He hates weird spellings. So, that one got axed early on, despite my persistence throughout the pregnancy.

3. Anna--We both loved this name, especially with Audrey and Allie. This one would have been perfect, except I knew a baby named Anna from my childhood who passed away. 

4. Adelyn--I liked  this name with Allie, but we chose to name her after family instead, so we chose Allison over Adelyn. I will most likely call her Ade (Addy) and that is also very popular. Plus everything rhymes with it. Still in the running. Adelyn Grace was the chosen name, so thought my husband, a week or so ago. And then there's the delimma on how to spell it. Spelled differently, it's pronounced differently. Adelyn, Adeline, Addalyn (which looks like Aladdin to me).

5. Piper--When I decided we didn't have to have all A names, this became our first choice. Piper Paige Piper Claire, Piper June,  were our top choices. But the more I said it out loud, the more I didn't love it. 

6. Quinn--A last minute consideration thanks to my friends on FB. We both really liked the name, but again, Audrey, Allie and Quinn.....and then there's that whole, "it's a boy's name" argument. So I teamed it with a really girly name: Quinn Aurelia. Kinda sounded like Queen Aurelia. Nope.

7. Aurelia--An A name indeed, I was on an Aurelia kick for a few days until I started to really pronounce it with the other two girls. It sounded more like a first born name to me. Too prissy and girly, which I didn't think was possible for us. We're pretty fussy around here. I think it could work as a first borns name, but not a third.






Sarah

Meeting Miss Ava

At 3:45 p.m. on February 7th, we met our new little girl. Weighing 8 lbs even and measuring 21 inches she entered this world within two minutes of the doctor making it into my room. Modern medicine failed  the last forty five minutes of labor and my "wish" to experience labor and delivery without an epidural was granted.

Ava Grace. A head full of black/brown hair, eyelashes models dream about, Audrey's nose, and the perfect lips. She's beautiful and we couldn't be happier.


The journey to meet Ava:

We arrived at the hospital at 7 am for an induction. My doctor broke my water at 8:30 am.  Ava's head was so far down it was acting like a plug, causing only a little water to come out. Lucky for me, that helped my contractions not hurt as bad for a few hours. When she moved and the last of the water came out, it began to hurt, BAD. I was in active labor from the time she broke my water.

I resisted the epidural for five hours.

At the end of those five hours, the contractions were INTENSE. They had been every 2 1/2 minutes for the last four hours, getting more intense with time. Not that regualar contractions don't hurt but I still believe that pitocin makes them stronger.  I could no longer walk or stand during them. After five hours of contractions and the last hour being almost unbearable to me the nurse checked me. I had not progressed any further that what I'd been the day before  in my doctors office (4 cm, 80%) I was disappointed, frustrated and plain mad that my body wasn't progressing faster. At that point I wished I'd either gotten a doula or had a woman in the delivery room with me. I gave up and asked for the epidural. Within minutes the anesthesiologist was in there and I was explaining to him why I was anxious. During my last labor, the Dr. hit a nerve trying to administer the drugs sending sharp pains down my legs.

I survived the epidural, with minimal nerve pain this time and began to relax a little, unable to ever get comfortable. I could still tell when I was having a contraction.

I got the "shakes" again with this labor. I hate the uncontrollable shaking that happens when your hormones and body changes--probably that transitional period of labor. 

An hour later the nurse came in and told me to roll over--they'd lost the baby's heartbeat AGAIN on the monitor. All the cords and IV's and gowns make it so inconvenient to move while in labor.

Not long after being on that side I began to feel pressure. Upon repeating that fact a few times and acting uncomfortable, the nurse checked me. A 7! Woo hoo. I was finally making progress. She then said, at approx, 3:00 p.m. that we'd have a baby by 7 p.m. which meant, I would not have a 12 hour labor this time. A goal for sure. Check! I continued to feel pressure and tried to work through it.  I did not ever remember this pain/pressure with the other girls.  I don't remember the exact time as I was busy breathing like a mad woman but not long afterward the nurse could tell I was feeling more than I should and we realized the epidural had worn off, despite my efforts to push the button and give myself another dose. I was quickly an 8, and then within 5 minutes, a 10. Upon hearing the word "complete" the whole parade of nurses began to flood my room with tables and instruments, etc. A call goes out to my Dr., who is across town. I know it will take her 8-10 minutes with good traffic to get there, and I'm not sure I can wait that long. My main delivery nurse wasn't either, as we hear her call into the hallway for another doctor.  I begged and pleaded with the nurse to let me push and did a few times anyway. The nurse was holding Ava's head in by the time the doctor got there.  I interrupted my doctors pep talk and said while gasping, "Can I do this now?" 

I was so exhausted after this labor. I'm not sure if the last hour just wore me out so bad but I literally felt like I'd run a marathon. I didn't want to do anything but lay there and hold my baby. I couldn't see straight, I couldn't think--and I was in some pain. And my  uterine contractions afterward this time--oh baby!

Because of the said above, it took us awhile to finalize a name for her. So long the Grandmas were starting to get pretty anxious as it had been over an hour since they got the text that it was time to push.

My parents came up to meet Ava that night, and we opted to FaceTime with the girls while at the hospital instead of having them come visit. They stayed with Jeremy's parents. This worked well most of the time. We sent pictures via email and Grandma would print them for Audrey. Audrey carried around a little photo album of Ava and would later show her friends at preschool. She loved looking at pictures of Ava. Audrey was much more interested in talking with us than Allie.  In the end, I was glad I didn't have the girls visit in the hospital.





Sarah

Introducing Miss Ava

Ava Grace 

Tuesday, February 7th 

3:45 p.m. 

8 lbs, 21 inches long 

Sarah

My little singer

Audrey is really into singing, making up her own songs and singing her versions of songs she's heard.

Tonight I followed her voice down the hallway to her pink room where I found her standing on her bed, with a play microphone in hand, singing to the wall as she rocked back and forth and be-bopped to her tune in her nightgown. It was a tune I did not recognize, so she undoubtedly was making it up as she went.

I hated to have to tell her to keep it down, but her sister was trying to go to sleep across the hall. She has no problem belting out songs in the comfort of her home. I can't wait until she's old enough for the kids choir at church.

She's always loved music, from playing the piano, to Kindermusik classes, to any entertainment that has to do with music or dancing. At preschool, her teachers comment that singing songs is one of, if not her favorite activity.

I love my little singer.

Sarah

Walking with Winnie the Pooh

Allie's favorite stuffed animal is Winnie the Pooh. Audrey and Allie's latest thing is taking Pooh Bear for a walk around the kitchen/dining room area, each holding one of his hands. I have no idea who or how this started but they did it again today and I just had to get a picture.

Sarah

Umbrellas

Today it rained. The girls were so excited to use their new Rapunzel and Dora umbrellas when we ran errands.

Sarah

I 'wuv' you, Mom

Allie melted my heart this morning during Sesame Street. Out of practically no where, she climbs on my lap, gives me a great big hug and says, "I wuv (love) you Mom". Everything pronounced clear as day, except for the "love." In fact, at first I wasn't sure what she said, so I asked her to repeat it. So glad I did. I'd been telling her that everyday since she was born, and just today, out of the blue did she tell me on her own. So for today, that made it worth not being in the hospital delivering her little sister.

She has recently began talking up a storm. She repeats EVERYTHING, and forms sentences like she's been talking for years. So I've had to watch what I say. Like the other day, I told Jeremy in a playful tone to "shut up". And she right then said, "Shut-up, Dad." Oops.

Her pronunciation is great. She takes after her mom there. Perhaps a career in radio or television??

For today, I'm thrilled with her over zealous hugs--she throws her arms around my neck and squeezes as hard as she can and just stays there and lets me hold her for awhile.  She gets right up in my face and gives me kisses. She is indeed my cuddly child. And I love it.


Sarah